Nov 28, 2005

No Longer Mine

Her name is mine.
Her thoughts: my thoughts and every flickering image played in fast forward and slow motion. How can I control these thoughts that are constricted in a controllable environment?
In every motion and in the stillness of time, it all pulled me into the ignorance of my soul. Your soul I drowned in grief because of the walls confining my movements. I vowed not to put these thoughts into actions. I vowed in tears that sealed those words, but then why?

Again and again… My name is hers.
My thoughts: her thoughts—these time the thoughts of guilt and shame. Who shall I succumb to? For no other one has seen me wail and groan in pain and no one even recognize a face that belongs to mine and the heart that was hers Pounding and pounding into this heart of mine. In every nails, bore down into Your palm and with every promises You instilled into this heart in a streak of Your rich-colored blood. I learned to unbecome me and to finally give in to You.

In my knees, I surrender my all to you. In my knees, I give you this life…
this soul…
this heart…
and this mind.


Just take this all away, take everything in me away… Take her life—my life
her soul—my soul
her heart—my heart
her mind--- my mind

In You, I am no longer her--- I am no longer mine. But I am Yours.
Yes, Your thoughts--- my thoughts. And in everyday, that Your heart and mine is locked in wisdom, I begin to know You and the You that I have to become.
Your name through The Cross—is mine.

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